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+---- Thread: The lighter side of DEATH. (/showthread.php?tid=760)
The lighter side of DEATH. - Vortar the Mad - 01-12-2011
Vortar exulted in the sound of bone splintering under the force of his swing. His great sword descended with unmatched force into the brittle skeleton of his undead foe. Bone chips flew in all directions, cascading off of his armor with eerily out place high pitched tinging sounds.
Beneath the massive four horned helm the half-breed orc smiled in murderous glee; the skeletal warrior was nearly too shattered to maintain cohesion while he had only suffered a small wound from the undead’s rusted sword. It’s nearly eroded blade clanked harmlessly off of his thick armor plates. Vortar pressed his advantage, he knew only a few more swings stood between him and the treasure the creature guarded that and glory would be his.
Mercilessly he hammered at the long dead warrior; twice he struck at the skeleton and saw it falter. Leaning all his massive weight into the next swing he strove to finish it. The skeleton warriors wasted blade thrusted out towards the orc’s thick breastplate and skipped off, sliding upwards in murderous arc that snaked its way through the eye slit of his helmet and lodged deep into the startled orc’s eye. As the rusted weapon rammed deeper Vortar fell to his knees, his remaining eye staring into the eternally leering skull of his adversary. His last thought was of Grumsh, one eyed all father of the orcs and the incredible appropriateness of an orc dying with only one eye.
Darkness engulfed him and pain relented to nothingness in an eternal second. Vortar opened his eyes and found himself on a nearly featureless grey plain. Vortar dimly remembered being here a brief eternity ago. He had fallen many times as was to be expected of an orc whose nature embraced glory over sanity. In the beginning he had been whisked away from deaths door by mysterious allies who explained nothing of their motives. Then these allies had abandoned him in favor of less troublesome pawns leaving him to decide his own fate.
The purveyor of destiny stood on this plain a giant. Spectral and clad in the crimson robes of the red wizards of Thay it had taunted him, “Hail the dead” it mirthfully intoned. Vortar had charged it with furious abandon those first few times, brutally flailing his spectral appendages and gnashing his incorporeal teeth until ethereal foam had spilled from his mouth like the virulent curses he spat at the apparition. Hours he had spent himself in futile fury...his blows having all the effect of wind on shadow.
Amused the entity had acknowledged Vortar’s fighting spirit and allowed him to choose to claw his way back from the underworld to the mortal realm with the aid of a human skull and an ever higher sacrificial tribute.
Those first few times had been thus, but not the next few, or the few after that….and definitely not this one.
This time when Vortar gazed out upon the grey plane he spied the spectral giant in the distance floating in a seated position. Glowing translucent cards arrayed in the ether before him bearing strange markings. The apparition seemed focused on the cards before it, shuffling them absently while regarding their symbols with intense concentration. Without lifting its gaze the giant gestured indistinctly and flatly intoned, “Vortar….skulls are over there, leave the sacrifice in the bucket.” It then raised several cards to float within the complex pattern and paid him no mind.
Crossing the gray expanse towards the skulls Vortar started to steel himself for the immense pain of chewing off part of his soul to place within the bucket when he saw something else moving in the distance.
Vortar stared out into the distance at the rapidly advancing speck in the gray nothingness for a long moment before turning to the spectral red wizard and asking, “UmM…WhAt tHat?” “What’s what?” the giant replied without looking up. Pointing at the speck Vortar said, “THaT!” With resignation the apparition lifted its gaze and stated, “Chariot, congratulations…. pick the middle skull” before returning to the cards. “What that MEAN?” Vortar queried with evidence of unrest in his eyes. Exasperated the spectral giant replied, “It means you must have made some friends since last time Vortar, okay? MIDDLE…SKULL..!”
Swiftly the speck drew closer until Vortar could plainly see it was a chariot, an ornate flaming chariot made of black chains and bone being drawn by thirteen matching nightmare stallions. Smoothly it pulled up and the delicate twisted frame of its door swung open. A handsome human nobleman in baroque finery smiled a warm inviting smile and gestured towards a seat across from him. “Get in” he said in a rich, smooth baritone.
Dumbfounded Vortar just stared. The nobleman seemed non plussed by this and said, “Vortar blood of Tharax, please…Get in.” “How you know my name?” Vortar questioned. Flippantly the stranger replied, “Well I AM a god.” Even more befuddled Vortar asked, “….Grumsh?” “No…Gargauth I’m afraid.” the stranger replied impishly. “I work much cheaper than he of too many balls and too few eyes!”
Vortar knew not what to make of the strangers blasphemy and took a step back. Sighing, the nobleman leaned out of the door with a casual grace and asked, “Are you hungry warrior?” Vortar nodded in spite of himself and the stranger held up a hand and snapped his fingers, a brief gout of flame appeared and as it winked out a delicious meat sandwich appeared in its place. “Dying has a way of working up an appetite.”
Vortar accepted the offered meat sandwich and as he started to chew the nobleman continued, “SO….It would seem someone has arranged for you to ride back to the lands of the living in my chariot Vortar, so you should get in and let’s get going.”
Vortar between bites spewed, “Why you?” Laughing the stranger replied, “Oh I don’t know Vortar, I guess since I am the Tenth lord of the nine hells everyone figures I have lots of free time…..”
“Nine HELLS?!”, Vortar exclaimed! “Yes...NINE” and in an instant the nobleman’s face morphed into a diabolic visage so mind numbingly terrifying that even tempus might have shat himself, “HELLS!” he finished in thundering voice accompanied by a choir of terrified childlike voices .
Vortar dropped meat out of his mouth and had his spectral form had any bowels he would have loosed them. So quickly as to make it one doubt that it had ever been anything else the god’s face returned to that of a handsome human gentleman and broke into uproarious infectious laughter.
After a moment, at first crying a little Vortar joined in. “Got you!” Gargauth said. “Yes, you scare poop out of Vortar, Got him GOOD!” Vortar replied while spitting meat between bites. Gargauth leaned back and to Vortar’s delight offered him a whiskey Popsicle as he entered the chariot.
With a snap of Gargauths fingers the flames leapt high and the thirteen nightmares smoothly pulled the chariot away at impossible speed. Vortar reclined in the velvet lined seat, happily slurping his Popsicle, and while looking out the window in wonder at the flaming chariots progress he mused that this chariot was MUCH smoother than the one at the caravanserai and he couldn’t wait to tell Master all about the trip.